Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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