you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
