The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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