i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize