He is like the real live version of the state fair..
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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