How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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