Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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