I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
It's not a walk of shame if you run
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
