I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
