The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
