pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
