Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
