You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize