Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
