Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
