Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
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