What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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