We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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