matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
