3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My feet surprised me
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
