can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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