I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
