We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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