I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
