Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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