; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
