so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
