She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
All I want is dick and wine.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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