I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
