i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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