3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
