no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
