thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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