so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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