i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I love you.
Bad choice
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
