STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
BRING THE BAGELS
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
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