your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
