We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
