I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize