My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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