No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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