I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
