brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
