Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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