I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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