you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize