Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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