I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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