just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
