Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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